This solution is to Listen.
This is a miracle-working nugget! When our children wind us up and we’re Thinking what to do, a whopping 90% of the time our best option is to Listen and acknowledge we hear what they say. It’s really that simple!
I know. Listening when they behave badly feels all wrong. Like we’re loser parents and we’re letting them get away with it.
But trust me. Listening actually gives us control.
Here’s why: when our children feel understood, things calm down and then they’re likely to do what we asked them to in the first place. Hello the calm AFTER the storm.
Even better, when we Listen to our children, without correcting or criticizing, they become more confident and compassionate. Way-hey!
Getting tough when our children are being a nuisance makes them feel like they have to fight to get us to understand their side. Instead, just Listen and watch the magic happen.
Here’s how:
Pay attention when they talk
Don’t interrupt
And acknowledge you understand them
I’m not saying you have to agree with them. Just accept how they feel.
“You wish you didn’t have to tidy up after dinner. You hate tidying up.”
The results will amaze you.
When it works and you manage to avoid an argument, you’ll feel like Super-Parent.
When we Listen, our children feel loved and understood.
And that’s usually all they really want in the first place.
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